Sunday February 16th

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Another week, another avalanche of nonsense from the usual suspects, but don’t worry—Trump is making moves while the left continues to implode.

First up, President Trump is set to meet Vladimir Putin in Saudi Arabia, and naturally, the media is losing its collective mind. Meanwhile, Zelensky is hoping for a peace deal, because after burning through billions in U.S. taxpayer dollars with nothing to show for it, even he’s realizing that an endless war might not be the best strategy. With Trump back in the mix, diplomacy might actually get a chance—something Biden never managed between naps.

Speaking of disasters, The View has somehow outdone itself, proving once again that daytime television is where common sense goes to die. This time, they decided to insult a four-year-old—Elon Musk’s son—because when you run out of Trump talking points, apparently attacking a toddler is fair game. Imagine being so unhinged that your latest enemy is a preschooler.

On the economic front, retail is collapsing faster than Joe Biden on a bike. Joann Fabrics just announced the closure of 500 stores, hot on the heels of Party City shutting down 850 locations and Denny’s closing 30 more. And if you thought banks were safe, think again. Major banks have closed over 100 branches in the first three weeks of the year alone. But remember, the White House swears the economy is “stronger than ever.”

JPMorgan is also having a meltdown over people working from home, accusing employees of being lazy and demanding they return to their cubicles. Maybe if corporate America focused on keeping businesses afloat instead of pushing woke nonsense, they wouldn’t be in this mess. Meanwhile, California is literally shaking—three earthquakes in six hours.

AOC is making headlines yet again, and as usual, it’s not for anything remotely pro-American. This time, she’s releasing videos to help illegal immigrants avoid detection and arrest by immigration enforcement. Yes, an elected official is openly assisting lawbreakers, but if you question it, you’re the problem. It’s almost like she wants an open border or something.

On the corruption front, DOGE just uncovered a secret $9 million payment to the world’s largest news company for a so-called “social deception” study. In other words, more proof that the media is actively trying to manipulate the public. Trump, of course, is demanding they return the money, because if anyone knows how to call out rigged systems, it’s him.

And finally, a study confirmed what we’ve all known deep down—everyones best friend aka liberal ‘Karen’s’ women, the ones who spend their time screeching about oppression on Twitter, are officially the loneliest and unhappiest people in America. Turns out, shrieking about the patriarchy and canceling people for fun isn’t the secret to a fulfilling life. Who knew?

It’s been another wild week, but there’s hope on the horizon. Trump is back on the world stage, the left is exposing itself more than ever, and the meltdown is only getting started. Stay strong, America.

Imagine the unthinkable—Trump actually ends the Russia-Ukraine conflict while Biden is still trying to remember what country he sent our tax dollars to. The media meltdown would be glorious, but how exactly would the left try to twist it?

Todays Mood:

The Rundown This Week:

Border Crossings Take a Nosedive: Trump’s Tough Tactics Send Illegals Packing—90% Drop!

Well, well, well—looks like enforcing the law actually works! Illegal border crossings have dropped to historic lows, all thanks to Trump’s “radical” approach of securing the border (what a concept!). Customs and Border Protection (CBP) reports a jaw-dropping 90% plunge in daily migrant encounters. Turns out, when you stop rolling out the red carpet, people stop sneaking in. Shocker, right?

RFK Jr. Joins Trump’s Team as Health Chief—Big Pharma’s Worst Nightmare Just Became Reality!

Robert F. Kennedy Jr. is now running the show at Health and Human Services, and let’s just say Big Pharma execs aren’t sleeping too well these days. Known for calling out the medical-industrial complex, RFK Jr. is laser-focused on tackling America’s skyrocketing chronic disease crisis. No more rubber-stamping whatever the CDC and Pfizer say—this administration is putting actual health back in healthcare. Buckle up, America.

Trump Takes a Stand: Banning the ‘Forced Use’ of Paper Straws with New Executive Order!

Goodbye, useless paper straws—America can finally sip in peace again! President Trump just signed an executive order banning the forced use of those mushy, disintegrating disasters in all federal settings. Liberals can keep their compostable nightmares, but in Trump’s America, we believe in functional drinking devices. Plastic straws are back, folks, and freedom tastes better than ever! #MAGA

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Trump’s Tariffs vs. The Fed’s Rate Games—Who’s Really Running the Economy?

The latest inflation numbers just threw a wrench into the Fed’s big plans. January’s inflation report shows a spicy 3% annual increase—up from 2.9% last month—because apparently, everything still costs too much. The real kicker? A bigger-than-expected 0.5% monthly jump that has economists scratching their heads (and probably rechecking their Excel formulas).

Meanwhile, the Federal Reserve, still pretending it has this under control, decided to hold off on rate cuts. But here’s the thing—Trump’s America First tariffs could shake up the whole equation, forcing the Fed to rethink its “wait and see” approach. The question is: will Jerome Powell actually do something, or will he just keep staring at spreadsheets while Americans keep paying more for groceries?

Hertz Hits the Brakes—Stock Tanks After Dumping 30,000 EVs!

Turns out, forcing rental customers into EVs they don’t want wasn’t a great business strategy. Hertz just announced it’s selling off 30,000 electric vehicles, and Wall Street responded with a big ol’ thumbs down—sending the company’s stock into freefall. Who could’ve predicted that mandating high-priced, unreliable cars with limited charging stations wouldn’t be a hit? Oh right—literally everyone.

Hertz is now scrambling to fix the mess, admitting that maybe, just maybe, people prefer cars that can actually go the distance without a government-subsidized charging station. Looks like the “green revolution” is running out of juice faster than a Tesla in a traffic jam.

What Else You Might’ve Missed:

Mercedes Joins Tesla’s EV Empire—Because Apparently, You Will Drive Electric Whether You Like It or Not

Mercedes-Benz just hitched its wagon to Tesla’s charging network, giving its U.S. drivers access to 20,000+ Superchargers. Translation? If you own a Mercedes EV, congratulations—you’re now part of Elon’s extended family. The plan is to add 1,000 new charger stalls a month, because nothing says "green revolution" like making sure you can actually drive your car after 200 miles. Meanwhile, real Americans are still filling up their F-150s in five minutes and getting on with their day.

Tax Season Nightmare: IRS Says Your Refund Is on Hold—But Don’t Worry, They’re Still Funding Everything You Hate

Waiting on your tax refund? So is everyone else, but the IRS just announced delays because, well… bureaucracy. The agency is warning Americans to expect longer processing times this year, which is just what you wanted to hear. But don’t worry—while you’re waiting, they’ll still have plenty of resources to audit hardworking middle-class folks while mysteriously losing track of billions in wasteful spending. The real tax scam isn’t evasion—it’s the government.

Trump’s Tariffs & Gold: Is It Time to Ditch the Dollar?

Every time Trump tightens trade policies, Wall Street panics and investors start piling into gold like it’s 2008 again. With Trump’s America First tariffs shaking up global trade, will gold prices skyrocket? Let’s just say, when the Fed keeps printing money like Monopoly cash and China starts sweating, history tells us smart money moves toward precious metals. Might be time to stock up—before Biden tries to tax that too.

Chinese Companies Are Setting Up Shop in the U.S.—Because Trump’s Tariffs Are Actually Working

Chinese firms are scrambling to open factories and warehouses inside America to dodge Trump’s trade crackdown. That’s right—turns out slapping tariffs on CCP-backed imports makes Beijing rethink its whole “take over the world’s supply chain” plan. Trump put the pressure on, and now instead of cheap, tariffed goods flooding in from China, companies are forced to invest in U.S. production. America First policies? Working like a charm.

New Jersey Pays Up: $13M Settlement After Cops Mistake a Stroke for Being Drunk

File this one under oops. A New Jersey woman just won a $13 million lawsuit after state troopers assumed she was drunk—when she was actually having a stroke. Turns out, slurred speech and confusion aren’t always the result of happy hour. The case raises serious questions about police training, but let’s be real—if you live in New Jersey, this might not even crack your Top 10 wildest headlines this week.

Events to Watch Next Week: 🗓️

Closing Thoughts:

Remote Work vs. Return to Office: The Ultimate Showdown

Ah, the great American workplace debate: Should you be forced back into a soulless corporate box with fluorescent lighting that sucks the joy out of your existence, or should you continue "working" from home while your cat aggressively sits on your keyboard?

Let’s weigh the pros and cons—because apparently, this is still up for discussion.

Ah, the great American workplace debate: Should you be forced back into a soulless corporate box with fluorescent lighting that sucks the joy out of your existence, or should you continue "working" from home while your cat aggressively sits on your keyboard?

Let’s weigh the pros and cons—because apparently, this is still up for discussion.

Why Returning to the Office is the Best Thing Since Supply Chain Disruptions

• You’re Totally More Productive – Because let’s be honest, back-to-back Slack messages, toddler interruptions, and mid-day grocery runs weren’t exactly optimized workflow strategies.

• Hygiene Matters – Maybe it’s time to retire the “business on top, pajamas on bottom” look. Showering before noon? Life-changing.

• Happy Hour Exists – Where else can you complain about Karen from accounting in real-time over overpriced margaritas?

• Bring Back the Office Drama – Remember the thrill of watching Steve from sales and Emily from HR try (and fail) to keep their office romance a secret? Ah, the classics.

Why Remote Work is the Hill We Should Die On

• Commuting is a Scam – Waking up at 6 AM to sit in traffic just to stare at a screen you already own at home? Genius.

• Offices Bleed Money – The company will spend millions on artificial greenery for “employee morale,” but somehow your request for a second monitor is a budget issue.

• Coworkers Are Overrated – Let’s face it, the only thing worse than Karen from accounting over Zoom is Karen from accounting in person.

• Fake Perks Are Insulting – “Congrats on record-breaking profits! Here’s a single slice of pizza as a token of appreciation.” CEO: Buys another yacht.

• Your Coffee Is Superior – Whatever that sludge is in the breakroom? It’s an HR violation.

At the end of the day, whether you're working from home in sweatpants or back in the office wearing something with buttons—the real winner is… corporate America. 

Just don’t forget to mute yourself when ranting about it.